Staying close to Karl for 20 months teaches me about the deeper purposes of maintaining contact with a loved one who has died. I continue to carry his heart in my heart.

The research I review in Chapter 5 confirms that a bereaved person will benefit enormously from maintaining continuing bonds. I am convinced that there is no substitute for the comfort, support, advice, reassurance, and guidance we can receive via this remarkable medium.

THE Benefits for the departed person

And we must not forget the huge benefits for the departed one. For, as Rudolf Steiner and I explain in Chapter 4, the dead long for knowledge of — and contact with — the world they have left behind. The dead maintain a constant interest in the well-being of their loved ones and their activities. So — by staying connected — we serve our departed loved ones, as well as ourselves.


There is another important reason for staying close to our departed loved ones. And that is hope, pure and simple. Many characteristics of our modern life separate the living and dead. That sharp distinction (a uniquely Western innovation) serves no cause that I can identify. By staying close, we bridge a conceptual — as well as a spiritual — gap. Daily we rebuild and reaffirm the bridge between two realms. We reaffirm the tenacity and flexibility of the human spirit. And we offer hope in times of despair. Ultimately, The Reconciled Self is built on hope and lives in grace.

As our living Earth faces such tremendous despair at this time, seeking and receiving guidance from others who love this Earth is a wise project, with healing benefits for all.

My final journal correspondence with Karl

Geoff and Cate’s house, Brisbane, 23 September 2017


My sweet love,

This will be my last letter to you — unless an emergency arises!

I need to pull back. I need to let you go to your higher purposes now — and we must both do this with the greatest love imaginable.

I now see that I can depend on God to guide, protect, and care for me. You can be released for other things. You have loved me so well — for nearly 25 years. Now it’s time for both of us to move on.

I am writing this as bravely as I can. I am trembling, and my heart is in my throat. I am not invoking you, but you have entered me anyway. I do not blame you for doing this, and I will want to hear what (if anything) you have to say in return.

With John and Adele in West End yesterday, I more than glimpsed my future.

My new partner is waiting for me. You know I yearn for him. I wept deeply in the shamanic healing session — knowing that John and Adele were right — that you and I must now move away from each other.

We have done so much together. And one of those things will be a beautiful and life-changing book about how we have stayed connected.

What else can I say to you that I have not already said?

We have accepted, blessed, and forgiven each other. And now, sad as it sounds, I need to stop being your wifey – and you need to stop being my Beloved. I need to move you — and us — to a safe, new place in my heart — to allow space for new love to flourish there.

That prospect is terrifying — and I must do it. I must live my new life now — as fully as I possibly can! And you have much to do where you are. I cannot even imagine that!

So please do not come inside me. There is no further need to show me feathers on the sidewalk, although I will smile whenever I see them.

Oh, dear Karl! Your love gave me a chance for a new life. Your love blessed me with acceptance, gratitude, forgiveness, redemption, activism, and, ultimately, hope. I know I will see you in heaven and then I will dance and sing for joy.

You will always live in my heart.

Thank you so much for loving me.

Yours always,

Wadie ♥



Dear Wadie,

Yes, this is true, and it is right. I did not know the timing, but now I do – and I accept that what you say is right.

Our journey has astonished me — on all levels — and at all times. It has been a most marvelous journey, and it has healed my soul. Now we must transform this love into a new life — for you — and new adventures for me.

I really have nothing more to say. You opened my heart for me, and I have poured out my love to you.

And that love will never die.

So, dear Wadie, move on to great joys.

Of course, I will watch with even more love.